Note: I kept the original title even though I AM posting this … after I sent this to a choice few, most of them said I should post this. It is a reality – another glimpse into the culture. Some things are NOT pretty. So here is the blog I sent my closest friends – and now for the world:
This is a hard and sad blog. Not for me personally – well – it is sad for me because my heart hurts for lots of people here. And now I’m talking about the women.
Let me tell you – maybe it’s because I’m a woman – people talk to me. Women talk to me. And over the breakfast table in the morning, or more likely over coffee and sweet bread in the afternoon when we laugh and cry and just talk together – I get an ear full.
We talk about relationships sometimes. Specifically and generically. Sometimes specifically about the women I love and work with (I won’t share those secrets) and then generically about what life is like for women and the men in their lives in general.
What a horrible situation for so many. I know this is a machismo culture. Men are king here. Men can get away with whatever and it is tolerated: drinking, beating, abuses of all kinds, running around with other women – whatever. If women are even thought to be misbehaving, they get beaten or kicked out. If a woman doesn’t ‘tolerate’ her man or dares to complain, he leaves her. Whether there are no children, 1 child or 8. He leaves her alone. And forget any kind of child support.
Cecilia says – it’s better to be alone. Without a man. (How sad is that??)
And the saddest part of this is, it seems to be the norm. Obviously not for everyone: Balmore and Blanca have a relationship that is precious. They seem to be two souls on the same path – with the same desires in their work and service and how they live their lives in general.
To the women in my life: thank your lucky stars or thank God for your family situation. You have choices. And I would bet your spouse/significant other is, for the most part, responsible, respectful, loving and kind. We all have our moments and difficulties – and I know there are women (and men) who are mistreated in the States. But as a CULTURE… at least in theory, we don’t put up with it - those certain attitudes on the part of our men. Here they ‘tsk, tsk, what a shame, poor girl’ but no one does much more than that.
And the young women I talk to already have the attitude that there are NO men worth getting involved with. “They are all the same”
I originally sent this to a few of my women friends who I know I can share this kind of thing with. And I sent it to Mike … the man I love – who treats me so well. Who loves me - seemingly unconditionally - and has the patience of a saint while I’m down here for who knows how long. I am one lucky woman. I would bet that overall, you are, too! I hope so.
Prayers are requested for all the women on this planet.
And ya know… the men need prayers, too.